Happy Friday!

Mike Johnson became the new Speaker of the House this week. And while this remains a steadfastly non-partisan newsletter, I have to admit I had a soft spot for Rep. Kevin Hern in his quest for the gavel.

The Oklahoma representative (who took us on a real journey with this Tweet back in March) is affectionately known as the “McCongressman” for his former career as a McDonald’s franchisee.

On Monday, Hern deployed an unorthodox lobbying strategy to wrangle up Speaker votes — he delivered to each GOP lawmaker’s office a “Dear Colleague” letter stapled to a bag containing two McDonald’s cheeseburgers.

One has to wonder if Hern would have found more support if he upgraded to Big Macs — by Tuesday, Hern had ended his bid and thrown his support behind Johnson.

3 Numbers

76%

Of Americans who say they enjoy tipping, according to a BentoBox survey of 2,500 consumers. Yet nearly the same percentage of people — 74% — say servers should be paid straight wages and not be dependent on gratuities. (Glad we cleared that up.)

$8 million

Raised in a Series A round by PopUp Bagels, a viral bagel concept started in Westport, CT during the pandemic. PopUp customers pre-order bags of bagels and pick them up at specified times — then they’re encouraged to “rip and dip” the bagels into creative schmears like Pumpkin Spice Cream Cheese and, uh, “Halloween Fruity Pebbles Witches Brew Butter.” Fun fact: J.J. Watt and Paul Rudd are also investors.

30

Years that McDonald’s served its McFlurrys with an odd, hollow, vaguely square shaped spoon. That streak is now coming to an end, with the Golden Arches scrapping the spoons in favor of a smaller, more eco-friendly option. The hollow spoons — which were often confused for straws by both kids and very drunk adults — actually served a dual use as a spindle, and would be attached to the McFlurry machine as a way to quickly mix toppings into the ice cream.

Name That Chain!

You get three hints to guess this week’s mystery chain:

• This chain first made its mark in the DC area, with its first store opening in Arlington, VA.

• Obama once took an NBC camera crew along with him on a lunch run.

• Its main seller has many different topping combinations — by one count, up to 250,000.

WHAT IS THIS MYSTERY CHAIN? (The answer will be in next week’s email.)

Last week’s answer: Popeye’s

Quick Hits

• In legal news… Burger King — which is facing a proposed class-action lawsuit that accuses the company of misleading customers with its menu photography — took the step last week of asking the judge to sanction the the class-action lawyers who brought the suit. And Taco Bell can now claim a decisive 50-state victory in its Taco Tuesday trademark battle, after convincing the last holdout (a restaurant in New Jersey) to “part ways” with the term.

• Your koan for the day: Golden Corral without a buffet… Golden Corral is set to open the first location of its fast-casual concept, called Homeward Kitchen, in golf mecca Southern Pines, NC this December. The restaurant is situated in a former Chick-fil-A building and will feature dine-in, takeout, delivery and drive-thru ordering options. Its menu includes a slow-cooked pot roast, fried chicken and other Southern staples, and while the company is not planning on moving away from its buffet-centric restaurants, it does plan on “quickly” expanding the new concept.

• Pizza Hut announces extended hours… In a major sign that the labor market is improving for restaurant operators, Pizza Hut announced last week that “thousands of Pizza Hut locations nationwide” will now take orders until at least midnight, with some stores staying open until 2 a.m. The Hut plans on keeping a full menu during the late-night hours.

• TCBY, Mrs. Fields franchisor acquired… Family office Pearl Street Equity announced this week that it’s purchasing Famous Brands Franchising, the parent company of dessert concepts TCBY and Mrs. Fields. TCBY now has 88 traditional stores and 78 non-traditional stores (including kiosks); that’s down quite a bit from its halcyon days of the early 2000s when it reportedly had 1,800 locations.

• Life is becoming Blade Runner… Oregon State University announced on Tuesday that one of its Starship food delivery robots — which autonomously deliver meals to students across the campus — was the subject of a bomb threat. In a truly dystopian Tweet, students were warned to “avoid all robots until further notice.” By 2 p.m. the investigation had concluded with no bombs found, and a student was being booked for a disorderly conduct charge. (The student turned himself in; he says his Instagram post about bombing the bots was a joke.)

• But what will the Cows think? Chick-fil-A somewhat quietly opened its Little Blue Menu virtual restaurant in College Park, MD last month after concluding a test run in a Nashville location. The restaurant space contains no dine-in seating — orders are placed via the app or for delivery, and the menu includes burgers, wings, and sides like mini biscuits and sweet potato tots. CFA’s future plans for the concept are still mostly unknown: According to the company’s PR team, a Little Blue Menu food truck is set to open in Athens, Ga. later this year, and one truck is already traveling through Kentucky.

• Starboard Value announces turnaround plan… Starboard Value — which once famously released a 300-slide presentation as part of its turnaround plan for Darden Restaurants — unveiled a slightly-less comprehensive plan last week as part of its 10% activist investor stake in Bloomin’ Brands, which owns Outback, Carrabba’s, Bonefish Grill, and Fleming’s Prime Steakhouse. Among other fixes, Starboard said Outback needs to focus on better operations and more fun marketing, and it said Bloomin’s smaller brands show untapped promise as growth vehicles.

#Content Recs

• I’m going to keep highlighting the TikTok account of former McDonald’s corporate chef Mike Haracz until someone gently takes me aside and tells me to calm down. This week he was asked for a recommendation on the grocery-store product most similar to Big Mac sauce, and he gave a very unexpected answer.

• Panera founder Ron Shaich has a new book out called Know What Matters — and to Shaich’s everlasting credit, it’d appear that the book isn’t just business bromides. Shaich’s bringing some juicy morsels, including confirmation that McDonald’s tried to buy Panera Bread in the early 2000s and that Starbucks and Panera almost merged in 2016. (Gotta think with their overlapping customer bases that would’ve been a real estate nightmare…)

• Congrats to Atlanta’s first-ever Michelin-starred restaurants — if you’re also easily amused, the link is worth a click-through to see the Michelin Man mascot posing with the winners.

• New York’s hottest new restaurant is called… “Thai Food Near Me.” Inside the strange world of businesses that are trying to outsmart Google search.

• How food halls are making the leap from urban centers to suburbs (and even exurbs).

• TIME released its list of 2023’s best inventions this week (would someone mind telling the TIME editors it’s still October?). Several food inventions made the list, including the Sweetgreen Infinite Kitchen, GOOD Meat’s lab-cultivated chicken, and the pinnacle of American ingenuity, the Heinz Remix machine.

• Speaking of tech, the WSJ did a deep dive last week on Sweetgreen’s Infinite Kitchen, which, as RB points out, is beginning to feel more and more like a fast-casual game-changer.

Finally — in an attempt to spur the imaginations of fast-food R&D departments across America — each week I’ll highlight an international LTO that should warrant at least some menu consideration in the States. This week: DOMINO’S AUSTRALIA CRISPY CHIPS WITH PIZZA SALT.

Have you had Domino’s loaded tots yet? They’re not bad! Down Under, they’ve gone a step further, developing a chip (aka fry) coated with with a batter designed to keep the fries’ heat and crispiness during delivery (via emu, one assumes).

See ya next week.